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26-Jun-2017 10:12

You’ve just been hurt deeply by someone you care about!

Even when ultimately it’s nobody’s fault and nobody has been wronged, break ups hurt and we get angry at the people who hurt us. Here’s the seeming paradox of letting yourself feel all the feels – you have to be willing to let them go too.

There’s a part of you that, irrationally, hopes that if you can just make the pain go away, then the triggering event will have never occurred and you’ll magically go back to being the person you were that morning/yesterday/last week/whatever. All that numbing yourself is doing is ensuring that you’re going to tear the bandage off painful in the long-run. Another common mistake is to try to repress that come with a breakup in a mistaken desire to “be a grown-up” or “be mature” about it.

This, in fact, was a mistake I made after the break-up that set me on the path to who I am today.

certainly the only one that really holds up over time.

So clearly, while it was obviously sad, I had absolutely no cause to be angry or hurt. I recovered quickly and moved on without bitterness or rancor. I was determined to be “mature” about it and crammed all of that pain and anger away and tried to pretend I wasn’t feeling it.I repressed it as hard as I could and refused to even admit it was there.

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